Personal Communication

If there is one thing I have a big problem with, it is that of a person not speaking his mind.

Too many people keep secrets; too many faces are facades. You never know what another person is really thinking or feeling; You never know if what you see is what you get.

This breeds plenty of ill feelings, especially when the truth is eventually made known.

From a multitude of conversations with a multitude of people over many years, I have come to realise (and I am sure everyone else too) that a great deal of people do not like a great deal of other people.

Yet when I go to lunches and dinners and meetings and cocktails and weddings and family sitdowns, I see plenty of happy facades. Bullshit.

This should not be the case. People who have issues with one another should talk it out, face-to-face. No intermediaries, no letters, no e-mails, no messages.

SMS as a form of communication is by far the worst way to solve personal problems. Parties have the option of hanging an issue by not replying a message. The sender never knows what is really going on, and the issue at hand never gets resolved.

In my opinion, there is no room to be wishy-washy in interpersonal communication. You always say what is on your mind, you are always open and honest, and you do not hide your thoughts and feelings from the party you are communicating with.

It is precisely the act of deliberately withholding and concealing information, or the lack of drive to address and close an issue that creates suspicion and uncertainty.

I do not like suspicion or uncertainty. I do not want to make time to mindread and decipher hints and clues. I like an overt, frank, and direct communication of ideas and intentions.

Perhaps I do not live up to my own expectations of other people's methods of communication, but I am sure as hell working on it.

Comments

[Val]

hahah, cause that person is a LOSER that needs to go drill a hole in the wall and fuck himself..

[A.]

That's a very direct response. But how would carrying out your advice help that person, I really cannot imagine!